I got hurt what do I do now?CLF
When God made the world, he meant for it to be a good place. A place where everyone could live together in happiness and safety. God especially wanted children to be safe and happy. He wanted them to enjoy being children.
Yet, children do get hurt in our world!
There are many children, even among our friends, that are hurt deep inside their bodies:
- Sad, because their parents are divorced.
- Or sad, because someone that was special to them has died, like their mum or dad, granny or grand-dad, a favourite aunt or uncle, or even a close friend.
- Or afraid, because their dad and mum fight a lot. Maybe the dad hits their mum or maybe she hits him, or maybe the dad or mum hurts the children in such a way that one can see the marks on their bodies where it hurts.
- Or worried, because there isn’t always food at home and they must sometimes go to bed hungry or go to school without breakfast.
- Or frightened and anxious, because someone does things to them that they do not like and that upset them.
- Or scared that someone will break into their home and hurt them.
- Or frightened, because their mum, dad, granny, grand-dad, brother or sister is very, very ill and often in hospital.
- Maybe it is even you that got hurt!
What does hurt do to you?
When you feel hurt or frightened, different things can happen inside your body. Feeling hurt or scared can make your hands go sweaty all the time, you can have a sore tummy or head-ache that doesn’t go away, your heart can start beating very fast or you can even feel dizzy and sick. Sometimes it makes you feel as if you can’t breathe properly or you struggle to fall asleep, or feel too tired to get up in the morning. It can also make you have nightmares, or you may wet your bed at night. These feelings can also make you feel as if you are not hungry at all and cannot eat.
Feelings of hurt and sadness can also make it difficult to concentrate, or to remember what you have learned or what someone has told you. Your marks at school can drop, or you can feel playing with your friends or taking part in sports is no longer fun. These feelings can also make you get angry quickly and without reason so that you just want to fight with everyone.
These feelings may make you not wanting to go to school, because maybe you are afraid when your mother or father is not close by or you don’t know where they are.
It is not always easy to talk about the hurt
Why is it sometimes difficult for children to tell their mum or dad that they got hurt? If it is the mum or dad who had hurt the child, it will be difficult to tell the other parent about it. Children whose mum and dad are feeling sad as well often cannot speak to them, because they do not want their parents to be sadder still or even more worried. Or sometimes children really don’t know how to tell their mum or dad about something, because they are scared they will not understand.
- Then, who can I tell about my feelings?
- It is important that you speak to someone you can trust.
- It can be your own mum or dad, or a friend’s mum or dad that you really trust.
- It can be your sports teacher or the choir mistress or master.
- It can be your teacher, or any teacher at your school you know listens when children talk about being hurt or sad.
- It can be the secretary at the school or the carer at after-care.
- It can be the kind tea-lady or cleaner at the school.
- You can also tell a social worker, parson or minister, or the doctor.
- The important thing is to talk to someone you can trust. Or to someone who will help you find the right person to talk to about your hurt.
How do I tell someone about my hurt?
Start by saying to the person you’ve chosen that there is something you would like to talk about. You can say that it is difficult for you to speak about it. Say that you want to talk to the person about something alone, when that person has time to listen to you. Sometimes it is easier when you first write what you want to say on a piece of paper. When you go to see the person you trust, you can read what you have written, or give it to the person to read. It helps especially when you are worried you will leave something out. It also help just going over what you want to say in your mind.
Why is it better to speak about your hurt?
To tell someone about feeling afraid, sad or angry helps to get these feelings out of your body. This is necessary to be able to concentrate again in class and to remember what you learn more easily, to stop having head-aches or tummy pains, to stop your hands go sweaty for nothing, to help you to fall asleep easily and to get up ready for the day in the morning.
It is also important to remember that you can ALWAYS talk to the Lord and that you can share anything that worries you, that scares you, or makes you sad with God. God does really listen to us. He cares about each of us. He can help you find the right person to talk to. Don’t give up!
If you feel you can’t speak to someone face-to-face, or if the person you’ve spoken to cannot help you, phone CHILDLINE at 080 005 5555.